2005-01-27 - 1:25 a.m.
it has been too long since i have written anything in here. in major news: Rachel's visit went pretty well. i got a flat tire as i was picking her up from the train station so the first thing we got to do together was she watched me change a tire in single digit temps on canal street at 11:15pm. everything else went pretty well until saturday night when she got bored. but then i took her out dancing and i had an amazing time. she is a dancer(not a stripper or anything, she studies dance in college) so she was really good and i was intimidated but she said i did great. we were very happy on the dance floor. i felt like we were makinga bit of a scene because we would kiss sometimes on the dance floor and i always hated couples that would do that. she started "poking"(that is her term for voicing her personality assessment of me) at me sunday night and i had a downward mood-swing. it went was eventually ok though. she left monday morning and i was sad, so was she. we are both getting very frustrated by the distance which i knew was something we would have to deal with. danielle had a graduation party last week. i braved driving in a blizzard to go to it and i'm glad i did. it is always great to see her. and i saw brian brabson as well. there was an entire table full of snacks. the group of revellers spent a lot of time watching porn. last saturday i unofficially just stopped dealing with lindsay. it is what is best to do right now. every time i try to get at all close to her she hurts me, and even worse, has no concept of what that is. the rachel from this summer has written me out of her life completely. i don't understand it, her explanation was so illogical that i'm not even going to retype it. the Felt-ups will be recording this weekend. i am so excited i am counting the hours.
"No one can take life for granted anymore." Remote Control(?)- Bad Religion
