2006-01-19 - 3:52 p.m.
still feeling lonely as hell. i was sick as hell last week. i popped a capillary in my eye from forceful vomitting. it was disgusting. i missed the first three days of student teaching, but my cooperating teacher was out as well. it turned out to be fine. finals have been this week and i'm set to pretty much take over next monday. i'm not that nervous, i've been doing some pretty extensive prep work. hopefully this will all pay off with a decent job in a good district.
what is more troubling is that i still feel very lonely. i thought living at home again would help, but i don't think it will take care of all of it. it sure hasn't so far. sexual frustration is ripping my mind apart. i hate it but i can't seem to get away from it. i'm starting to feel like a deranged monster again. which leads me to inaction so the possibility of meeting a real woman is even lower than usual. i feel like there is a lascivious gleam in my eye that people can see. i hate it. i don't know what to do about it.
"Don't let this time go wasted" Monster- Rollins Band
